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May 16, 2005 9:41 AM- mea culpa
Heavy incense fills the air. Low chanting can be heard from the other side of the stone wall. I step inside a small, dark closet. A tiny screen slides open to reveal the watchful, listening Internet?my confessor.
Me: Forgive me, Internet--- it?s been four days since my last posting. In those 96 hours I have in fact had a number of post-worthy experiences and yet, did not post.
Internet: Were you ill?
Me: No, no.
Internet: You were too busy with more important things?
Me: Eh, not so much.
Internet: *sigh* Sloth is one of the seven deadly sins, my child.
Me: Hey?I wasn?t slothful!
Internet: *piercing gaze through the screen*
Me: Okay, okay?I was slothful.
Internet: What might you have shared were you not a self-indulgent twat?
Me: Um, I could opine on Sideways and Garden State.
Internet: Pfffft. Could you be anymore behind the times?
Me: I could have taken pictures of my adorable posh poochy plates I received from Kate!
Internet: And?
Me: I could?ve written about my nightmare Saturday night.
Internet: And?
Me: I could?ve told the story how Ta took a bullet for me by going to the Brimfield Fair without me which was, in her words, ?a monstrous junkfest.?
Internet: *yawn* Dude, you?re forgiven. It?s pretty clear you did us all a favor by not posting.
Tiny screen slams shut.
Me: Well, I was also gonna post about the wild sex, but hey, whatever.
got 2 cents?
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Sarcomical says: hey, i saw sideways this weekend too! ummm...i didn't get the buzz. i mean, not ALL full-frontal is GOOD full-frontal. or back-al. just...ick.
but hey, the sex part sounds to have brightened your weekend. ;) posted on: May 16
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stephanie says: I loved Sideways, but then I am a wino. And I never drink any fucking merlot either. posted on: May 16
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samantha says: It must've been something in the air - I watched Sideways (finally) as well! All the wine talk was interesting, and I liked the redemptive theme, as in Miles finally got his shit together, but I am with Sarcomical, the full frontal stuff was disconcerting.
Glad you're back, bp, now I can stop the obsessive clicking for a full day! You're never boring, dear friend, and I would read about paint drying on the walls of Soliden with glee. posted on: May 16
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lizardek says: Um, I don't think so. The Internet would NEVER call you a twat.
However, you are SO getting linked for this. posted on: May 16
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wee says: Forgive me, Sam, for I am evil. I thought you were going to say "It must've been something in the air- I had wild sex too" But alas. No.
Wild sex, wild sex, WILD SEEEEXxXXXxx!!! hmm. know that's something to confess. posted on: May 16
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samantha says: *giggling* no wee, unfortunately NOT. Picking out china is not exactly a sexy weekend activity - it leads more to murder than wild sex. posted on: May 16
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wee says: China patterns? You REALLY are a rebel! nudge, nudge, wink, wink say no more :^) posted on: May 16
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frecklegirl says: hmmm... hot sex ;)
You guys are cracking me up. posted on: May 16
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Kestrel says: I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who talks to her computer. My dog used to tell me that wasn't normal but now I can show her your site and say: "See! She does it too!" Booya. posted on: May 17
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