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January 06, 2008 10:01 AM- now dasher! now dancer!
Last night we were rudely shaken from a sound sleep by a pack of howling coyotes.
They were so close to the house and HOWLING with that high-pitched yelping that they do, well?it was creepy. Especially creepy because that morning I had gone for a rather long snowshoe hike (1.5 hours in knee-deep snow, across the lake, up hills?most unexpectedly, but that?s a whole nother story so let it suffice to say, my hair was wet and clipped back in topknots because I had just come out of the shower and didn?t know I was going to be, you know, hiking (!)? thought I was going for a leisurely stroll, but I digress) and out behind the house of the people I was walking with we came upon tufts and tufts of deer fur, scattered across the snow.
Apparently, some coyotes had killed a deer right there a few days back and now nothing was left, not so much as a bone or a hoof?just some tufts of fur.
And so, as I lay in bed being serenaded by the coyotes, all I could think of was those tufts of fur.
Ah, pretty?the sweet slumber of the country life.
In this moment, I am plagued with that feeling I get far too often where I have so many directions to go I simply freeze. Thank you cards that sit on my studio table waiting to get made and shipped out?delicious new paints and brushes that sing a siren call to my wax-filled ears?wax-filled because I must focus on getting my syllabus done.
Done, implies that I have actually started it, which?um, does thinking about it count? No, it doesn?t?so that is my whole day. Must get that done and delivered tomorrow as tomorrow begins a whole new semester. And, I?m just not ready. It seems the only thing I actually crossed off the list of things I absolutely needed to get done over the holidays was sluff about. Yes, sluff. I have sluffed with impunity and that was critical to my well-being, but now?oh how I want to launch into other things but, alas, not to be.
I think maybe I need to do a
mondo beyondo ritual?close out with 2007 and grab hands with 2008. Perhaps tonight once I have given the dogs a huge walk (which frankly is exhausting me just to think about it?but I must as I will be gone from morning to late night tomorrow so I need to know they had full-out exercise today) and gotten the syllabus done.
Does anyone else feel like this? You try to get on track and in rhythm and on pace and yet, you wake up and feel pulled in sixteen directions at once.
I?m not complaining. I am not. I?m simply trying to articulate the feeling so I will be free of it and move into the day. It?s a good thing to have so many wonderful projects! It?s a good thing to have so many things you want to do!
Okay, I suck at this. The fact is?I am not, nor will I ever be, a multi-tasker. I am just not built that way. When I have something to do, I have laser focus, full immersion and you would sooner shake a starving lion off the haunch of a freshly killed gazelle than distract me from completing the task at hand. However, I suck at juggling simultaneous projects. That is why I nearly went crazy last year at that job which was all about the emergency room environment. It?s safe to say, air traffic controller would never show up as a result on any career test I might take.
Okay. Enough with the blather?off to get two (TWO) things done today. In sequence. One and then the other. God.
Do I not dazzle you with my motivational message?
got 2 cents?
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bohemiangirl says:
I am so there. It's such an annoying feeling... so much to do that I end up procrastinating and doing nothing.. then I feel worse for it. This post was a reminder to stop reading about sublime Photoshop textures and vintage techniques and actually apply them and get some photos uploaded. STAT.
posted on: January 06
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Molly says:
This is such a completely common feeling... In fact, it's gotten to the point where I no longer take grading home over breaks because I know I won't get it done--I'll only get frustrated with myself for procrastinating. However, I note your hour and a half snow shoeing report, and I must say--I am IMPRESSED and very jealous. I wish I could stake claim to this kind of ice-and-snow-filled adventure. :)
posted on: January 06
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catherine says:
I am dazzled. Multi-tasking is a farce - there are few things one can do together at THE SAME TIME, so fear not BP, we have but two hands and one brain, each task must come one after the other - the only thing that can be done simultaneously is typing and talking on the phone, but one usually suffers for it. I WANT to be able to do many things ALL AT ONCE, I yearn for whirlwind speed accomplishing EVERYTHING at once, the yawp! I would yelp upon completing it all, at once. Magical.
Seriously, I know I am a workaholic. At least my liver is safe!
It's when you work in an office environment you are led to believe that multi-tasking is possible, and real. Switch to working at home and you quickly find out that one task is done after another ONLY. I cannot sew while I walk Goody. I cannot chop vegetables while I wash the dishes. I cannot blog while cutting fabric. It's the sewing - or anything directly hands on - that leads you to believe that multi-tasking is a lie. When I used to work in an office where they paid you for simply showing up (oh! those were the days!), sitting in front of a computer you would feel you were doing many things at once, the phone + email + projects...seemingly all getting done at once. ...I think I'm starting to ramble, I'll stop now. :)
posted on: January 06
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immersion says:
I began reading thinking, whew, BP is ahead of herself today dating the post at the 6th. Look, look again. Oh! yes the calendar does say today is the 6th. Where am I? One day, one task, or maybe two and in the end it all seems to come together or not. Take what you have done, what you plan on doing and remember you are not required to reveal all facets at once. The dust is always returning to my work space yet I too am determined to make better use of it. You do inspire BP. That's why I'm here now. Now, where is my duster? Let's get on with it!
posted on: January 06
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laini says:
Ugh about the coyotes. My parents have them too, but don't hear them much. A few tufts of fur was all that was left of one of their cats a few years ago :-( As for multi-tasking, I am the same way. I need to have miles of time and just one thing to focus on until it is finished. When this thing is a novel and it takes, like, a year, this can be a bit of a problem!
posted on: January 06
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lizardek says:
You dazzle no matter what. I can come and multi-task for you, darling! :D
posted on: January 07
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steph says:
"Does anyone else feel like this? You try to get on track and in rhythm and on pace and yet, you wake up and feel pulled in sixteen directions at once."
Uh, everyday.
I'm a lioness on a project, but I think that these days I'm just a senile lioness, pacing at the zoo, trying to figure out whether I should pounce on that red ball in the corner or slap a high-five on the hanging tree log, or yawn at the spectators, or, hey look! pink balloon flying away! weeee!
yeah.
so, what kind of coyotes do you have there?! There are NO man-eating coyotes, Lizbeth, darlin. Don't you worry.
They just outran a deer, they know they can do this. Probably took them all day, tracking it. You remember the roadrunner show? Crazy coyotes. They are so psyched to get that kill they prolly had an orgy afterwards. They do it in the field across from us. Sickos.
posted on: January 07
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Tami says:
I hope you carry some sort of protection with you when you walk; for you and the dogs in case the coyotes ever decide to show their faces while you are out. That thought would terrify me.
posted on: January 07
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Reya Mellicker says:
My sister says to me (when I'm in the midst of a paralyzing fit of planning) to make a list of all my tasks, then begin by doing just the first thing on the list. When that's done, do the second thing, etc.
Planning from the vantage point of seeing everything that "needs" doing always makes me completely anxious. That's when I freeze.
The year will unfold no matter whether we accomplish anything or not. Yes? It always helps me when my sister reminds me. One thing at a time, just one thing.
Happy 2008!
posted on: January 07
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Jazz says:
I'm not much of a multitasker either. You are not alone... Ten things demanding equal attention at the same time? I just can't do it.
posted on: January 07
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catherine says:
me again...one more thing to add...
when there's too many - that's a hard item to define "too many" - too many items on the list to accomplish, that's when it's entirely overwhelming and when the procrastination sets in, and the same when there are too FEW items... my life seems to function and flow when I have just the right amount of tasks to be completed for me to want to jump in and do them, when I have less or more than the "right amount" then I'll push those tasks off until late in the day, and THEN...when time becomes tight, then I'll crank through that list...it's a funny thing what's the right amount, too many/too few...but it's the same every single day. :) And if it's any consolation...it's raining here, cold, wet, rain, in an otherwise dry and warm landscape.
posted on: January 07
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teahouseblossom says:
Yeah, I've been feeling pulled in many directions at once lately. I think it's why it's almost 2 a.m. and I'm having bad insomnia. I have to get up in 4 hours!!!
posted on: January 08
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teahouseblossom says:
Oh, and I don't know where you live, but from your photos, it looks like a slice of heaven. Can I come and visit? I'll just sleep in a sleeping bag in your backyard.
posted on: January 08
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Chris says:
Hee! You are not alone, friend. I have the same feelings as I sit here avoiding several things. Just keep plugging away and know that's we're cheering you on!
posted on: January 08
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violetismycolor says:
We have coyotes here, too, and we're in the Portland city limits! We have all these little creeks running through the hills here and the coyotes use them as travelways through the area. They feed on cats and sometimes small dogs...
posted on: January 09
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gracia says:
"Last night we were rudely shaken from a sound sleep by a pack of howling coyotes."
Hooked from the very first line. Our expereinces geographically couldn't be more different. As to that feeling, I know just what you mean.
g xo
posted on: January 10
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Sam says:
Ooooh, coyotes. (You know how we say that, don't you? KAI-YOTES. Just thought I would let you in on the Southern narration in my head.) It's too bad they are simply part of life in the country - thank goodness you don't have kitties that they like to munch up for an afternoon snack. We still suspect those mean coyotes for the disappearance of two beloved family cats - o! the sweetness of Sunny and Panda!
But yes - it's so good to have so many lovely things calling your name.
posted on: January 10
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