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June 26, 2007 12:25 PM- the 6 million dollar dog
Please feel free to insert sighs into the following.
Sunday afternoon in Vermont. We are lolling by the lake, recapping the wedding, when someone asks me what time it is. Let me check my phone, I say, and turn it on.
ME: Hey. I have a voicemail.
Types in password. Throws a rock. Laughs as it splashes nephew. Absently listens to recording.
JEN, our dog sitter: Um, Henry ran after a deer and just came limping out of the woods and while I was brushing off the, like 50,000 ticks all over him, I saw he has a bone sticking out of his leg. I think he's broken his leg. I've called the vet and he's going to meet me in the vet hospital.
Ends voice message. Suddenly I'm finding it difficult to breathe. Fortunately, my husband doesn't need me to speak because he can read my mind.
T: You gotta be kidding me.
Phone rings
Dr. J: (in a low and frustrated voice that indicates he would like to hang me from the top of the tallest pine tree by my ovaries.) Hi Elizabeth. The leg isn't broken. Henry has a piece of wood lodged through his thigh. I'm prepping him for surgery right now.
ME: (Trying to think of things to say that don't make it seem like I am the single worst person to have ever been entrusted with a dog and failing, miserably.) Um, um. Um.
I swear to god, if this had happened on my watch I would not blame our vet for having me locked up for Munchausen by Proxy for dogs. I mean-- have you SEEN Henry's rap sheet? The dog is either on a quest to be the Steve Austin of the canine set or he is masochistic or he is just insane when it comes to deer.
Remember the last piece of branch he impaled himself on? That is nothing compared to the 5.5 inches of stick that Dr. J pulled out of him Sunday. Not to mention the smaller 2 inch piece from his foreleg amid the abundant cuts and abrasions. Needless to say, Henry is out of sorts-- what with a giant, white cone that he has to wear at all times and the drain tube oozing blood and pus down his leg.
I'm sure now that I've given you such a happy image you'll all want photos of the wounded wonder--- I'll post some later in the week. No time at the present.
I can hear him crying down in T's office where we have him set up as comfortably as we can muster. He knows Daisy, Ollie and I are up here in my office and he isn't happy about it.
So that's the news from Lake Wobegone-- and you?
got 2 cents?
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wee says:
o! Henry! No! Not again! Rest up champ and heal quickly. ooo. No wonder he always looks so worried. there are whomping willows and such out there in Soliden, lusting for Henry's flesh.
xoxoxo love! wee
posted on: June 26
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dodo says:
Dear Henry, please can I be your nursemaid? I will snuggle and lick you and let you sit on my best cushion. I will share my hide chews and pigs ear, and did I mention the licking?
Yours in doe-eyed adoration, Rose
posted on: June 26
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lizardek says:
O Henry! (suddenly a chocolate craving overwhelms) Wwere you showing off for Daisy?! (also EEK BP, I can't imagine getting a voicemail like that?Geez LOUISE)
posted on: June 26
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Margaret says:
Aw, poor kiddo!!!
posted on: June 26
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victoria winters says:
Poor baby!!!!!! I hope he's okay now. :(
posted on: June 26
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Heather says:
Poor baby. I just got back from vacation with J - a week, including camping, and I definitely still love him. Woohoo!
posted on: June 26
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molly says:
My stomach dropped when I read this!! When will the bad boys learn to stop taking so many risks??!! Poor doggie. Nothing is sadder than a woeful pup!
posted on: June 26
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nichole says:
fuckity fuck !!!! sorry I just cursed on your blog. good to know he's OKAY. if anything that dog is certainly RESILIANT! :)
posted on: June 27
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Jazz says:
HENRY!!!!!!! C'mon dude, you're old enough to know better now! You've gotta stop this impalement thing you have going on.
posted on: June 27
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otter says:
*kissing Henry's furrowed brow*
posted on: June 27
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Joy says:
How does he DO that? I mean, the other dogs aren't randomly impaling themselves...
posted on: June 27
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Sheryl says:
Oh no! And there you are far away and can't do anything. (But I must say it's not your fault he's the dog version of Evil Kinievil.)
posted on: June 27
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bad penguin says:
Hennry, you poor baby. You've got to learn to be more careful! *internet kisses for Henry*
posted on: June 27
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impossiblejane says:
Two words: Pet insurance
I got it after my cat decided that bumble bees were a tasty snack. He still hasn't learned his lesson. It has paid for itself several times over.
My kitty and your Henrey would be wonderful buddies. I'm sure of it.
posted on: June 27
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Auntly H says:
Loyd sends heaps of sympathy to Henry. Actually, Loyd may have forgotten all surgeries and the "lampshade" incidents, but I haven't. The stick lodged in his neck required 2 surgeries to find and remove it. I hope your vet got all the stick out of Henry's leg on the first try! I hope you all recover quickly.
posted on: June 27
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Sam says:
Oh, Henry. So traumatic! Such a daredevil! If there was anyway to channel this energy of his, maybe like Puppy Special Forces...
Maybe it is the week for dogs getting into bad scrapes - Velcro, now a country farm dog, apparently got punctured, perhaps by a cow? He is fine but I hope he's learned to keep back from those pesky horned creatures.
posted on: June 27
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bohemiangirl says:
Ah! Henry says. But the chase is sooo good, I cannot resist it. Poor boy. Trust me, in my opinion, you are the best dog mama out there. I think Henry would much rather have a stick in his leg than be tied to a short leash or locked up inside.
posted on: June 27
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Molly says:
Poor guy! It's always so scary when it's the one that you love... makes my little fractured elbow seem silly in comparison. :) Here's to a swift recovery!
posted on: June 27
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river selkie says:
oh brother! henry, henry, henry! ::shakes head:: what to do with you?!
he's either a crazy daredevil or the biggest klutz ever. i'm so sorry, but i am just so amused by his crazy antics! glad to hear he is going to be ok. :)
posted on: June 27
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catherine says:
ACK! GASP!! BLUBBER BLUBBER! SPOUT! OH! BP, you poor thing...yea, and Henry too...gaahwwd! I'd be a sobbing mess if something like this happened to my precious one...hence, I normally wrap Goody in bubble wrap when we go out for walks and do not let him run or smell things lest he comes back to me injured...ok, I DO let him smell things. You, BP, are a far braver Mommy than I. :)
posted on: June 27
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Kari says:
And they say cats have nine lives... henry is the exception to the rule.
posted on: June 28
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tinker says:
Wow - what a scare! I'm so glad I read the next post first, so that I know it all heals up quickly. ((hugs)) to you and Henry!! Oh, ok, here's ((hugs)) for Ollie and Daisy, too - they're too cute to ignore. :-)
posted on: June 29
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