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May 11, 2006 4:46 PM- snap

Places someone should put a time-elapse camera:

1. At the post office. Right in front of the radiator that is next to the giant trash can.

We would watch as every morning at 7:30 am the hard-working US postal employee dutifully stuffs grocery store/car dealership/direct marketing flyers into each box.

We would watch as each person opens their mailbox. Turns. Sets their mail onto the radiator. And then, sorts through it, dumping the flyers directly into the giant trash can.

The can fills.

At 3 pm the hard-working US postal employee arrives to empty the giant trashcan into the dumpster.

Wash. Rinse?yada yada.

2. On the crabapple tree at work.

Right now it is in full-fucking-fantastic-flower. An abondanza 10 foot cluster of pops upon pops of pink and white. I would eat it if I could, but I'd settle for watching it bloom over and over and over again.

3. In the doorway of my office.

We would watch as I rise from my desk, walk around my desk, whack my ever lovin? knee on the corner of my desk.

Again.

Then again.

And again.



got 2 cents?



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andra says:
well move the stupid desk....heheheh...how are you my friend?! hugs and a smile, andra
posted on: May 11

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Saltwaterprincess says:
Seems to me like a crabapple tree would be the only reason to go to work ever. Well that and the cash, I suppose. Can you ducttape a pillow to the desk for your poor knee?
posted on: May 11

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lizardek says:
It does bloom over and over again. You just have to wait through a year. :)
posted on: May 11

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Croila says:
You need to take a huge photo of it in full bloom, turn it into a poster, and stick it on your wall! The trees (dunno what kind) are out in full bloom in my neighbourhood - all sorts of pink and white flowers. It's absolutely beautiful but such a shame they only last for a couple of weeks.
posted on: May 12

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sarai says:
i have a permanent bruise-the corner of my desk gets me every freaking time.
posted on: May 12

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gracia says:
Far better a knee than a head. I seem to always find a new and novel way to knock my head each day - doors, chairs... any surface will do, I'm not fussy. cheers, gracia
posted on: May 12

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wee says:
O, BP, swoon. This post is so fresh... I dunno. I just love it. And you tooooooooo!
posted on: May 12

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frecklegirl jess says:
I have the same problem with my coffee table at home- I have a permanent bruise on my calf. Hate. Junk. Mail. Making plans to come up to your neck of the woods this summer- will keep you updated!
posted on: May 12

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Sheryl says:
Haley's bedroom floor, watch the clothes being dropped, and hear my voice 5 seconds later telling her to pick them up.
posted on: May 12

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teahouseblossom says:
Yeah, all through Times Square there are always people handing out those flyers. And I see people grab them and put them directly into the trash. And I always wonder, why not cut out the middle man and just pay that person to take the whole bundle of flyers and throw them directly into the trash?
posted on: May 14

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christina says:
Ha! this post is brilliant. I totally agree about the post office thing. Does anyone actully know if that kind of junk mail actually gets consumers?? And the apple blossoms, I'm hoarding mine: we have several apple trees and a crab apple at our house and they take my breath away again and again.
posted on: May 14

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Ruby's Mum says:
I've never seen a Crabapple tree, but it sounds lovely.
posted on: May 14

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Heather says:
I seem to run into walls a lot. I mean I know that wall is there, but I totally misjudge where the door opening is or something.
posted on: May 14

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steph says:
You kill me! My parents have an island in their kitchen that nearly always ran into my hipbone. In fact, it hurts a little as I recall it.
posted on: May 15

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Joy says:
Sometimes those little circulars come in handy. Haven't you ever needed to make a ransom note with cut out letters? :)
posted on: May 15

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etta says:
Yeah... What's with all the junk mail in the world? Does anyone actually read the stuff? If the world can afford to pay people to stuff innocent mailboxes with pure unadulterated crap, they should take that money and tack it on to teachers' salaries. Or donate it to scientists researching something important, like eco-friendly, sustainable airplane fuel made from recycled junk mail. Or *something* else.
posted on: May 16

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jes says:
ugh...TELL me about the junk mail thing...it's horrible i tell 'ya! A few years back i started making homemad paper from our junk mail, because I felt so horrible about it, but dude, I couldn't keep up the production! It was that bad! UGH!
posted on: May 16

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wee says:
I'm hearing about rampant flooding in your neck of the woods... are you okay?!
posted on: May 16

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Swirly says:
I love the idea of putting cameras in peculiar places just to watch the world go by from a very specific spot.
posted on: May 16

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Rebekah says:
The cameras would of course have to record sound - I bet you and the postal worker sing the same f*&(*(^$#ing song!
posted on: May 16

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samantha says:
Yes, you know that your friends get worried when they hear about bad weather in your general area - send us a sign! Smoke signals! Tap dance into our dreams, whatever it takes!
posted on: May 16

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Sheryl says:
Seriously, just "the boys and I are dry" would ease our minds.
posted on: May 17

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Sorry, comments are now closed.




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